relationships part 4 – the oxygen of relationships

Love is the ultimate human experience because love is an experience of unity. We are drawn to love because it reminds us that our individuality is part of a greater Totality.

Love is a unity moment. The coming together of two in order to experience something greater than the sum of the parts – a communion of two souls for the bliss of union.

The way we come together in relationships is through shared experiences. We cannot have union without sharing.

Shared experiences are the oxygen of any relationship. In the absence of experiences that are shared, a relationship will soon become strained and very thin. Ultimately it will starve because it lacks the essential ingredient to sustain love.

So what defines a shared experience?

Two people may be living in the same house, paying the same bills, looking after the same kids, loading the same dishwasher, going to the same movie, seeing the same sunset… and not having a shared experience. Shared experiences go beyond the day to day of co-habitation. They go deeper than the observable storyline of our lives.

A shared experience exists on a more subtle level than the surface of life. It may not be visible to others however those who are in it will know. It is being experienced on the level of feeling and emotion and it begins with the simple intention to share:

I intend to share.
I am willing to give.
I look forward to the bliss of union.

The power of the subtle intention to share is what initiates the whole process. And the desire to know what another is experiencing is what sustains it:

I want to understand what you are experiencing.
I am ready to listen.
I want to feel what you are feeling.

When we truly care about the experience of another, then we are opening ourselves to a unity moment. Then we are open to love.